Tags: cancer, colon, colostomy, couple, dad, drugs, expect, fitted, health, hii, liver, medications, oncology, spread, starts

what to expect??

On Health & Drugs & Medications » Oncology & Cancer

8,983 words with 7 Comments; publish: Sat, 15 Dec 2007 20:03:00 GMT; (90094.24, « »)

Hi

I have posted a couple of times about my dad. He has colon cancer which has spread to the liver. He has had his colostomy fitted and starts his chemo friday....just wanted to know if someone can help me with what i should expect? how much care he will need? ( he is 60 and he lives on his own). I think they are going to give him palliative chemo to begin with..... sorry this is so vague, i'm feeling quite confused...he was told by his consultant that he will not die...? :confused: , and my sister in law is being very negative and filling me with fear and worry :dizzy: ! Anything from you guys in the know would help....thanks

All Comments

Leave a comment...

  • 7 Comments
    • My mom is close to 60 and lives on her own too. She got surgery (and colostomy) in Nov, and has just started chemo this week. After surgery, she needed more care than she does now. Mind you, this is only her 3rd day, and she may not feel sick until next week. But, she has been driving herself there and she seems to feel ok for the time being. I am prepared to go grocery shopping for her etc, if she begins to feel sick and can't leave the house. Remember to think positive, cause it can make it a lot easier. Of course he is not going to die, and he needs to know that he can fight it, and have a normal life again. My mom's cancer spread to lymph nodes, but appears to not have spread to her liver. So, I am kind of in the same boat as you...waiting to see how it goes. That's all you can really do, cause everyone reacts to chemo differently. Best thing is to just be there for the extra support if need be. Good luck & hope everything goes well! :angel:
      #1; Mon, 17 Dec 2007 01:15:00 GMT
    • Thank you H4B, that has reassured me a lot.... I will update you all on how it goes, I hope your mum continues to do well and keeps her independence...i think that is very important....
      #2; Mon, 17 Dec 2007 01:16:00 GMT
    • My father is now 66, was dx'd in May w/ stage IIIc colon cancer...7 of 12 nodes involved. No spread to organs. He began his chemo 6 weeks after his surgery...48 hours of infusion (pump at home) and 12 days off. He had 12 cycles of this treatment. He lived with us for the first 6 treatments and was on his own for the final 6.

      I would say the biggest issue for him was the first 2-3 days after he was infused. He would often feel faint and very fatigued...eating was a challenge! While he was with us we could make sure he had lots of choices..availablity of food. The smell of food would make him ill so I would prepare 3-4 days worth of food ahead of time.

      On his own this was a struggle for him. He did not pre-plan too well and of course when you are not feeling so great you don't want to prepare, think about food and fluids! Luckily he had some friends near by so they would make and bring him food. He had friends he could call and who would be there quickly if he felt faint or that he would pass out.

      He drove himself to and from appointments. He was independent and would work a few hours a week. After the first week he would begin to feel better and return to a pretty much normal routine! He was fine--no excellent --but fine. I think it was at times harder on us because we couldn't see how he was doing and were reliant on what he was telling us which wasn't always the complete truth :) !

      I hope everything goes well. Attitude is so important! It's difficult to be positive when you are filled with fear and worry! Do your best and help him by talking positively towards him even when you are feeling down!

      Well wishes!

      ~P

      #3; Mon, 17 Dec 2007 01:17:00 GMT
    • Hi

      I have posted a couple of times about my dad. He has colon cancer which has spread to the liver. He has had his colostomy fitted and starts his chemo friday....just wanted to know if someone can help me with what i should expect? how much care he will need? ( he is 60 and he lives on his own). I think they are going to give him palliative chemo to begin with..... sorry this is so vague, i'm feeling quite confused...he was told by his consultant that he will not die...? :confused: , and my sister in law is being very negative and filling me with fear and worry :dizzy: ! Anything from you guys in the know would help....thanks

      Hi Fannyann

      I hope your dad is improving every day.

      It is great that you are trying to help him. But to help him I think you need to know as much as possible, preferably first hand from his oncologist (who my not be his surgical consultant).

      You need to know

      what type of chemo he is having, is he having a port fitted,

      will he have a pump fitted and go home,

      what regime are they implementing (frequency and method of admistering), how often is he having assessments and blood tests (they need to do the tests to see how well he is responding and how well he will take the next dose),

      what type of back-up does the onco dept offer in an emergency in case he gets a bad reaction or infection.

      If your dad's cancer has spread to his liver, it means it is at an advanced stage. Do you know if they have talked about curative treatments rather than palliative?

      It is also a good idea to try and find out what they are expecting to get out of the treatment plan they are offering, and also what other alternatives are there?

      When my mum and husband were diagnosed, we were in a complete spin too but the hospital were good at getting us organised and we soon realised that we needed to develop quite a disciplined approach to the chemo and getting all the appointments in the right order (and remembering to turn up for them !! )

      I think to ease your mind too, you need to have a good chat with your dad on his own. It will probably ease his mind too. I had a hard time with mum sometimes as she did not want to burden me with her illness but by not telling me what was really happening just messed things up really. When she was honest with me and my brother and sister, we were able to help her. It meant facing up to the fact that we were going to lose her and how, but at least we could all be with her on the same journey.

      I seem to have bombarded you with one of my outpourings, hope it helps

      regards

      ktee

      #4; Mon, 17 Dec 2007 01:18:00 GMT
    • Hi all, and Ktee & H4B, thanks very much for your words it helps to share all this.... I'm sorry to all those I may have scared with my rantings! I have been under a lot of stress recently and have become a bit irrational i guess. My mum died 2 years ago, i had a nervous breakdown and my mother in law died, both this year...now my dad with cancer....kinda makes a person paranoid! Anyway he went to see the consultant today and they are going to use 2 types of chemo...fluorouracil 5fu and oxaliplatin... he starts next wednesday...he seems very hopeful and has been in a better mood since the bag has been fitted...less pain. Ktee, I took your advice and have had a chat with him...he is dealing with it like its a cold!!! I think thats a good thing though...shows he is thinking positively...just hope the side effects are not too harsh!!! Thanks everyone, and I hope everyone is doing v well!
      #5; Mon, 17 Dec 2007 01:19:00 GMT
    • Hi fannyann

      I am so pleased you sound a lot more positive. The chemo your dad is having is the same my husband had. Side effects vary from one to another but most have to deal with tingles/numbness to hands and tongue/throat. The nausea for husband was a problem. The drugs they gave him to start with were not v.good, so for his 2nd and subsequent cycles he had the strongest anti sickness they would give him (suppossitories and tablets) and he took them religiously. If your dad is the type to try and avoid taking tablets, please encourage him to take them ...... there is nothing worse than dry-heaving just after major surgery. He will probably need anti-diarhea stuff too but I do not know how this affects colostomates........... Jaydees and friends can probably advise you on that one.

      Husband found the effects wore off a couple of days after treatment. His treatments were every two weeks.

      Good luck for your dad on Wednesday.

      regards

      ktee

      Just thought I would also add that "cancer stress" is a terrible thing to go through ...... worse for those who have it ...... bad enough for those who have to sit on side lines and watch it happen to someone we love. It sounds like you have had a lot of grief to go through over the last couple of years so being hit by this again must feel terrible for you. Like you, I find it really helps to share experiences on the boards here. I was also fortunate to find an excellent councellor to talk to face to face and I would encourage anybody else in the same boat to do the same.

      #6; Mon, 17 Dec 2007 01:20:00 GMT
    • Thanks Ktee. I will update you all as to how it goes. The doctor did say that he would likely have the tingling hands and sore mouth...which he already has so maybe there wont be too much difference! Thanks for the advice, I have been seeing a counsellor for about a year now...good job really!!!
      #7; Mon, 17 Dec 2007 01:21:00 GMT